Chris J. Davis and Shawn Grimes among others wrote how people shouldn’t hide behind nicknames and abstract Gravatar icons. I used to have my whole name on my site but I don’t anymore. Why? Because I got scared a couple of times.

In Finland connecting your whole name with your address is very easy, especially when so many people own cell phones (it’s harder to look for me in the phone book — one of few perks of still living at home — but my cell phone is registered under my name). I don’t have the luxury of being “John Smith” (sorry, Mary Smith) in a country of dozens of millions of people. And because of that, some people (who turned out to be weirder than they seemed at first) have let me know that they know exactly where I live. That bugs me, because I definitely don’t want to meet them. Why was I so stupid that I gave too much information for them to do that to begin with? I don’t know. I was na├»ve.

I don’t keep a blog because I want my whole family reading about me, about my revelations on how I stay up till 6 am writing a big paper — not that it’d be a horrible thing if they knew. Then again, back then when I didn’t have a computer of my own, Dad wouldn’t let me have the power cord for the laptop, because he didn’t want me to stay up too long. I think I sneaked upstairs to get the cord when the battery was low and returned it before anyone woke up (I got up at 6:15 that morning). I don’t like the possibility of someone too close reading something I wouldn’t want them to read. At least I don’t want to make it any easier for them to find me. Maybe I’m just too paranoid; Dr. Phil says that people wouldn’t think so much about what other people think about them if they knew how little others actually do think about them. (Now there’s another tidbit you’d probably be better off without.)

To be honest, I don’t really even know why I keep a blog (or a site, for that matter). I’ve noticed I read my old posts quite often so it’s sort of a diary on what’s been happening (which doesn’t interest anyone else), but I do manage to actually write about some clear topics at times. My other sites (XF, Stephen King, aliens) which I’ve neglected horribly recently function as databases of information for me (how selfish am I?!) and if someone else finds something useful or of interest there, I’m pleased.

OK, back to topic (or at least closer). My Gravatar is from my current layout. It was a hasty solution because I didn’t want to be without a Gravatar on Jafer’s site :) The icon doesn’t have my mug because I don’t think it’s presentable (my favourite coffee mug might be). If my Gravatar were my face, I wouldn’t comment anywhere because I wouldn’t like having to look at it all around!

In addition, I took the Gravatar idea as a representation of my site, not my self. I wouldn’t know what represents the true me (besides that damn mug of mine). Definitely not a bright splash of purple, and a square of black would be too depressing.

At least I use my first name here so I’m not too “bad” a person.

(I set out to write something that makes sense. I’m afraid this doesn’t — much. Maybe you do better.)